Unus the Untouchable is a lame X-Men villain from back-in-the-day (first appearance X-Men #8, 1964) who can psionically create invisible forcefields around himself. That’s actually a pretty cool power, and it’s not what makes him lame. His dated, cheesy appearance is not what makes him lame. What is that emblem on his belt anyway, a menorah? It would be cooler if it was. No, what makes Unus the Untouchable so lame is…
His name is Unus the Untouchable.
It’s that simple. If your name sounds like “anus” and your nickname is “untouchable?” People are going to laugh.
I’ll bet Unus has heard his share of rude comments about his name – maybe some just like this (prepare for comedy):
“That’s really your name? That’s funny, because it sounds like ‘anus.’ Have you ever heard that before?”
“Is that Greek?”
“Were you named after the goofy but lovable deputy on The Dukes of Hazard?”
“I’m sorry, did you say ‘anus?’”
“Hey Unus! Can’t touch this!”
“Anus! Hey, Anus! Ha ha ha!”
“My mom told me to stop touching my Unus because when I go to sleep I rub my eyes and I can develop a staph infection or styes or something on my eyelids because of the poo and stuff.” *
“Hey, Unus! Slide me that chair!”
*I am so sorry.