Thursday, August 03, 2006

THE INFINITY GAUNTLET #4 Marvel Comics, 1991


Alternate Reality Where Everybody Dies Week would not be complete without a look at The Infinity Gauntlet, Marvel’s crossover mini-series of 1991, particularly issue #4, the one where the mad titan Thanos battles an army of the mightiest Marvel heroes – and like, totally kills them.

The brainchild of Jim Starlin, master of the trippin’ balls cosmic comic book, The Infinity Gauntlet is primarily the story of the villain Thanos’s quest for the most powerful handwear in the universe in order to impress Death, who he has a major crush on. That’s right – the guy is literally in love with Death. He loves Death so much he wants to marry her and have babies. Perennial Starlin favorite Adam Warlock teams up with The Silver Surfer and a bunch of Marvel heroes to stop Thanos’s mad scheme to wipe out reality in order to impress girls, and shit gets crazy.
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"The Infinity Gauntlet is like a Meat Loaf song in comic book form."
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The great thing about The Infinity Gauntlet is that Thanos actually succeeds in getting the Gauntlet about half-way through the story. Most comics would be about stopping the villain from getting his hands on the ultimate weapon, but this one is about what the heroes do after the bad guy has acquired God-like powers.

Plus, since Thanos is arguably the main character of the series, the reader spends a lot of time with the sinister Titan, and darn it, you kinda get to like the guy. As written by Jim Starlin, he’s a little more complex and grandiose than your run-of-the-mill unstoppable cosmic villain. Mr. T has flaws and weaknesses beyond the standard blind arrogance and fondness for expository dialogue that most super villains have. The guy’s doing it all for love, and if the universe has to die so he can prove he loves his woman, then damn it, the universe is just going to have to up and die. That’s beautiful, man. The Infinity Gauntlet is like a Meat Loaf song in comic book form.

In this particular issue, a strike force of heroes attack all-powerful Thanos on his asteroid base, which is like a cross between Castle Grayskull and the stage for Dio’s 1984 Last in Line tour. Despite the superhuman firepower assembled by the good guys, Thanos wipes the floor with them in creative ways.

Cyclops gets a cube of force slapped around his head, which makes it hard to do stuff like fire optic blasts and breathe:

Sure enough, Cyclops only makes it a few panels before suffocating.

Wolverine doesn’t do well, either:

The others don’t fare much better. Iron Man gets his head torn off by Lady Thanos, a creation of Thanos that also kills Spider-Man (Not for real though, kids! Don’t worry, it’s an Alternate Reality so it doesn’t count.); Namor and She Hulk get engulfed by this creepy brown fungus; Nova gets turned into sparkly colorful little cubes; The Scarlet Witch and Cloak explode; it’s not pretty.

Actually, it is pretty. Ron Lim and George Perez shared penciling duties and Joe Rubinstein inked The Infinity Gauntlet #4, so the whole book has a bright, clean look to it that sort of lessens the impact of all the carnage, which is handled somewhat discretely anyway. A lot of the deaths happen off-panel or are done in non-gratuitous ways.

Don’t take my word for it. Here’s Thanos taking Quasar to school:

Sure, the hands getting blown off thing is violent, but let’s put it in perspective: there isn’t protruding bone and arterial spray. Plus, his execution is off-panel. The whole thing is handled with a degree of restraint.
Me, I like that sequence because I hate Quasar so much. Don’t try to talk me out of it; Quasar is no damn good. Let's move on before I start getting angry.

Anyway, how is this comic different than The Punisher Kills the Marvel Universe, which also has a high body count? The Infinity Gauntlet #4 isn’t wiping out your favorite heroes as some sort of sadistic exercise, it’s wiping out your favorite heroes because it wants to convey the high stakes and long odds of the conflict.

Plus, although the heroes get taken out easily by Thanos, none of them go out like punks; they all go down swinging. In both comics, Dr. Doom gets killed, but in The Punisher book, he screams like a little girl before he dies and in The Infinity Gauntlet, he gets fried while trying to grab the Gauntlet from Thanos, which is a typical Doom move. I’m fine with characters dying, but give them some frickin’ dignity.

Speaking of dignity, Thanos turns Thor into a pretty glass statue!

Of course, Thanos doesn’t keep his new Thor statue around for very long; it lasts about a page before he gives it the old Infinity Gauntlet Mark II Backhand.

Finally, the only hero left standing is Captain America. The Sentinel of Liberty stands toe-to-toe with the mad god, defiant to the last. Actually the whole battle has been a big distraction engineered by Adam Warlock. When Thanos cocks his omnipotent fist back to administer an old-fashioned coup de grace on the good Captain, The Silver Surfer streaks in at near-light speed, trying to snatch the Gauntlet from Thanos…

…but he misses. D’oh!

Shaken by his close call, Thanos gives Cap the Mark II and recharges his god batteries. Now he is truly unstoppable! Until The Infinity Gauntlet #6, of course, when Thanos gets stopped, big time. All the heroes come back to life and ha ha ha, isn’t life grand?

The Infinity Gauntlet was a big hit for Marvel, and it spawned a series of sequels such as The Infinity War and Pimp My Inifiniti, as well as an ongoing series, Warlock and The Infinity Watch. I’m a fan of all that 70’s Marvel cosmic stuff, so I read them all. Let’s just say that some were better than others.

But that is a post for another day! For now I lift my imaginary glass to Thanos, for daring to dream big and for killing Quasar, even if it didn’t count. I will overlook his attempted homicide of the universe, because his motives were pure.

Love makes you do crazy things.

60 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love that Quasar's reaction to his hands being blown off is "Not again!"

How many times has this happened to him?

Anonymous said...

Hey, Quasar is awesome! By the undying shade of Mark Gruenwald!

That said, good review. Dangit, Infinity War and Infinity Crusade sucked. Wish I hadn't missed this one.

Anonymous said...

Hey, I like Infinity War! Infinity Crusade did suck it pretty hard, though. Even I can't really defend Infinity Crusade.

Tosy And Cosh said...

No scan of Cap's shield shattering!!!??? Where's the love?

Anonymous said...

If you didn't have a heart attack the very moment the Surfer made a grab for the Gauntlet- and MISSED- then you have no soul. Infinity Gauntlet is twelve shades of AWESOME.

FashionWhore said...

This begs the question:
If Thanos and Death have little...things, what will it be like at the parent-teacher meetings?

Rob Schamberger said...

Actually, IG starts with Thanos already having the Gauntlet, not halfway through. He got it during Thanos Quest (a series I really need to track down and read some day).

I love that first issue, because it has him just snap his fingers and HALF THE UNIVERSE FRIGGIN' DIES! That is SO COOL.

David Campbell said...

Thanks Rob! How could I forget Thanos Quest, which ruled?

appojax said...

sweet post. Adam Warlock rocks the block. keep up the good work Dave!

Anonymous said...

"Dillusions" of grandeur?! Uggh. What was his editor doing with his time, because apparently he wasn't editing.

Anonymous said...

Fantastic call on the art. It's completely off-putting, like a vacation brochure for a hellhole.

Anonymous said...

Man, what have you got against Cyclops? You show him getting it three times this week. Okay, he is a major league tool, but where's the love?

Anonymous said...

Allright, so he gets his hands chopped off 4 times--how do they keep growing back? Is he visiting one of the "enhancement" spammers on Dave's comments page?

K.Fox, Jr. said...

Si, love makes you do crazy things. I'm glad Quasar's dead too, to me, it seems like the only worth-while 'cosmic-type' supervillains are GL (Hal Jordan, John Stewart, Kyle Rayner, and Kilowoag; all of 'em except for that punk Guy Gardner)and Silver Surfer. Anyway, it just seems like Scott went out like a punk. I mean, you could've shown us a picture of him TRYING to kill/beat up Thanos.

And his and Death's kids would be kind of embarassed, huh? I'm glad he did it outta love. I'm kind of a romantic. Dude, check out my blog, comic fans unite: http://comicfans-unite.blogspot.com/

Anonymous said...

Now and again, Marvel can really pull off some stories entriely worthy of the name 'COSMIC'.
Thank you for finaly explaining something everyone's been telling me was wicked rad.

Anonymous said...

Of course Dave, if you hate Quasar you should really pick up Annihilation - Nova #4.

Anonymous said...

Dang, Infinity Gauntlet was good.

It just makes Infinity Abyss and MU: The End look that much more pathetic in comparison.

I liked the Thanos series, though-- even the Giffen issues. Gotta love the return of Starlord (the forgotten son of cosmic Marvel) and the Gladiator letting his mohawk and stubble grow.

Bully said...

Let's all give Quasar a big hand, ladies and gentlemen!

Anonymous said...

I think they started to lose it sometime around "Infinity Scuffle".

JYD said...

The Infinity Gauntlet awesome, and I've been trying to get my non-comic reading friends to give it a look as an example of why comics rock so hard, but could never find the words to do it. I'll just direct them here now.

Brilliant.

Jason said...

Infinity Gauntlet #4 is THE comic that turned me into a fan as a teen (tween, maybe - depends on the month).

I still love that book, despite how much of a comic snob I've become.

Anonymous said...

It was my understanding that the Infinity Gauntlet series was in the main Marvel Universe reality. The deaths of all the heroes was just undone. That's my take on it.

Otherwise, I couldn't agree more about how badly the subsequent Infinity series of books sucked. With the exception of the Thanos Quest and Infinity Gauntlet series, the others that followed were progressively worse than the ones that proceeded them.

Anonymous said...

This is one of those comics that really freaked me out as a kid. I wasn't used to the mass slaughter of superheroes (although being a regular reader of What If? changed that pretty quickly). Despite (or maybe because of) that, I read this one so often the cover came off. And Captain America's last stand still resonates with me to this day.

Anonymous said...

I can't wait for the series titled Infinity: The End, just so I can giggle at it on the shelf.

Tim Easy said...

I'm still waiting for the Infinity Condom

Anonymous said...

I loved this one when it came out. I think I'll have to dig it up and re-read it since I remember it being quite cool. Didn't issue five or six or something have really big cosmic entities trying to beat Thanos? Like Celestials throwing planets at him and Kronos throwing Thanos through time? I distinctively remember such a thing happening but I'm not sure what issue it was or if it was even this series since I'm from Finland and we have our own publications so we don't necessarily have the same issues as you across the pond.

LaRue said...

"...most powerful handwear in the universe." Awesome.

Anonymous said...

"Didn't issue five or six or something have really big cosmic entities trying to beat Thanos? Like Celestials throwing planets at him and Kronos throwing Thanos through time?"

M'yep. It must've been issue five, because it came directly after this one.

In fact, this one ends with all of the cosmic entities (Galactus, two Celestials, Kronos, Lord Chaos and Master Order, Master Hate and Mistress Love, The Stranger, that weird floating head thing that bossed Quasar around) apearing above Thanos' fort, ready to really kick things into high gear.

Honestly, though, that one dissapointed me; I didn't find it to be as creative as Thanos' fight against the normal heroes (Except the Celestials throwing planets at Thanos. That was cool).

The other dissapointment was that Odin and the other "Sky-Fathers" (Leaders of the Russian, Mayan, Aztec, Greek, Egyptian, Celtic and Algonquin pantheons) were all trapped in Asgard and cut off from the battle.

I guess having Thanos fight the Super-Heroes, Cosmic Beings AND Gods would've been too senses shattering even for the Mighty Marvel Marching... guys.

Also, yes, Quasar goes out like a punk in this issue.

Pretty much every other hero gets a few licks in before Thanos kills them, but Quasar just floats down, talks about how bad-ass his quantum bands are, and then Thanos blows him up.

It's completely pathetic, especially since I just went back through that issue and discovered that, yes, literally every other hero who fights Thanos hits him hard enough to knock him off balance at least once in the fight.

Did Jim Starlin have something against Quasar?

Anonymous said...

Another great review Dave, I love this 'everyone dies' week.

There was a What If where the Silver Surfer *did* grab the Gauntlet from Thanos, and had godlike powers at his disposal as a result. At the end he realizes unlimited power corrupts and gives it to Warlock for safekeeping. Good stuff.

Here's hoping "Ruins", "MU: The End", and the What If where the Avengers were pawns of Korvac, get the Campbell treatment.

Anonymous said...

Why all of the Quasar hate? Functionally, the character is derivative, but the stories were cool. In his run, we saw the return of the Squadron Supreme, the New Universe, the characters from QuestProbe. We visited the Blue Area, some of the worlds of What If, and lots of other cool places in the Marvel Universe.

Quasar's characterization in the beginning stunk (moping, 'I'm-not-good-enough' syndrome). I had a hard time with the fact his nickname was 'Sooner' - is that a Wisconsin thing? WTF?

Anonymous said...

I don't know, either. I loved Quasar's solo run...that had some great stuff in it. I really enjoyed the fact that he was a very laid-back kind of hero, which turned out to be the reason he was able to deal with the quantum-bands in the first place. Plus, he rented space in the Baxter Building. If that's not cool, I don't know from cool.
Also, wasn't his nickname "Sonner" and only his parents used it? I assumed it was a Wisconsin in-joke or something. I don't know; I'm in New England.

David Campbell said...

You people are high! Quasar sucks!

Okay, I actually don't hate Quasar, I just think he's generic and boring and a Green Lantern rip-off. I reached this opinion the hard way, by reading Quasar comic books, which I don't recommend. Anyway, I can understand how reasonable, intelligent people would like Quasar - I am just not one of those people.

I feel the same way about Wonder Man.

Anonymous said...

David,

You forgot one of the coolest things about the Infinity Gauntlet series was when Wolverine sinks his claws into Thanos, the narration (by the Silver Surfer, I think) states that of all the heroes assembled, Wolverine was the LEAST like likely one to kill the Mad Titan.

As a kid, I was shocked! I read that passage over and over and over again, because I was certain there had to be some sort of mistake. Wolverine had been, and continues to be, billed as the most dangerous thing on two legs in the Marvel Universe, but when Starlin acknowledged that Wolverine was completely outclassed and out of his element in Infinity Gauntlet, it really underscored how dire the situation was.

Tegan O'Neil said...

Dave:

http://whenwillthehurtingstop.blogspot.com/2004_07_01_whenwillthehurtingstop_archive.html#108935365299057366

Do not cross me on this.

Tegan O'Neil said...

Er, here.

Unknown said...

Dave:
Good Shooooooow!!!!

Fantastic.

Congratulations
Nando

David Campbell said...

Holy crap, Tim! Everybody go read Tim's post about the Quasar series - it's an excellent commentary on Mark Gruenwald's work. I ALMOST like Quasar now.

Unknown said...

Great review... and thank you. It's good to know I'm not the only one who hated Quasar!

Anonymous said...

Slight nitpick, but at the end of the Silver Surfer What If, I think he blow'd up the Gauntlet good.

Anonymous said...

Ooooh, very nice commentary.

And I was annoyed when Quasar was killed off at the end of Annihilation: Nova, but c'mon, how many times has he died and come back under his own power? He'll be fine.

Anonymous said...

Huh.

41 posts and no one has mentioned the fact that this story ain't eligible for ARWED Week because it didn't take place in an alternate reality.
This happened in the mainstream, 616, Marvel U. All those heroes really* were killed by Thanos and he really did wipe out half the life in the universe.

*Yeah, I know...

J'onn J'onzz, Martian Manhunter said...

Almost like Quasar, Dave? How many Quasar comics have you read? It only gets good after the second year.

Anonymous said...

"The Infinity Gauntlet is like a Meat Loaf song in comic book form."

Wow, I was just thinking today that Meat Loaf is like Springsteen in comic book form!

SwanShadow said...

Future Infinity sagas will include:

Infinity Smackdown
Infinity Underwear
Infinity: Electric Boogaloo
An Infinity Home Companion
Infinity: The Legend Continues

and the mini to end all Infinity minis:

I'm Thanos, B***h!

Anonymous said...

The Infinity Gauntlet was the series that got me into comics. Issues 4, 5, and 6 made me say "Hey, I want to read more of this stuff."

Chris Sims said...

I really, really wanted Marvel to do a big Thanos-centric series called "INFINITY CRISIS," just to royally screw with the legions of customers I dealt with who couldn't pronounce the word "Infinite."

Anonymous said...

I have a doubt.
Captain America should have peak human reflexes and agility, right? Then why couldn't he dodge Thanos' Mark II backhand?

Francesco

Enargy said...

Well, Cap's ankles were bound by floor-hands. That's right, Thanos' powers including creating hands. From the floor.

Anonymous said...

Best moment in that series was when all the heroes were assembled...and Doom was there too. Everybody was veeery suspicious for only a very short while until the Man himself plainly stated 'yeah, yeah, I'm here not to save everyone but I'm really out to get the gauntlet for myself'. Totally in the knowledge that none of them were really in any position to do anything about it.

J'onn J'onzz, Martian Manhunter said...

"Infinity: Electric Boogaloo"
Isn't that the subtitle to some Pokemon manga?

Nik said...

Shoot, I *know* I didn't just read Dave slam Wonder Man! C'mon, he had a big gay Christmas tree outfit! And a safari suit outfit! He's the Blackwell's best dressed of superheroes!

Anonymous said...

To enargy:

Still, with peak human reflexes and agility, he could have easily ducked under Thanos' backhand, or something else.
Cap taking a backhand like the last of the rookies? I call bovine excrement on that.

Francesco

Chance said...

My favorite part of this series, if my memory serves, is Iron man's head bouncing in the panel after his head is town off. That's class.

Anonymous said...

Bob was there, too.

Just About Anything and Anyone said...

My God, you are awesome!

Anonymous said...

I know the "alternate reality where everybody dies week" is over, but you could really review that "Super Seven" story from Superboy Annual 1 (1994).

There's lots of thing to mock there.

Anonymous said...

Good call. Infinity Gauntlet No. 1 was the first comic book I remember actually buying for myself. Thanos has been my idol ever since.

Anonymous said...

Hmm, it's not quite an alternate reality, since it all did happen... I think Adam Warlock just changed everything back after the Gauntlet was relinquished, and the Marvel heroes have no memory of it... Except the cosmics of course.

But yeah, I love the Thanos character and the Infinity Gauntlet, even if he began as just a Darkseid copy... But like Deadpool compared to Deathstroke, he's became his own character who is only really that similar in that he looks similar.

However the Thanos Quest story is definitely my favourite part of the Infinite Gauntlet mythos. Seeing Thanos outsmarting the most powerful beings in all the universe so easily is really just awesome, but the ending is especially great... Don't wanna spoil it, but let's just say that it's a real kick in the balls for Thanos once he succeeds.

Anonymous said...

Quasar's rules!
www.bringbackwendell.com

Anonymous said...

After that, Adam Warlock got just about every cosmic entity from Galactus to the embodiments of Love, Chaos, Hate & Order to kill Thanos. THEY ALL FAILED! They did okay to start but THEY ALL FAILED!
Then, Nebula (Thanos' non-granddaughter) who was turned into a corpse-like slave stole the glove by walking up and grabbing it off of him. Just grabbing it off. That easily!

verif:
wkaru- sounds like a Japanese name. Which is awesome.