It's not unusual it happens every day
no matter what you say
you find it happens all the time
love will never do what you want it to
why can't this crazy love be mine
"It's Not Unusual"
Help me out here, people.
Some background: I still haven't gone digital. Instead of an MP3 player, I lug a cheap-ass disc player to work.
This morning I was on my way to work on the safe and efficient Washington State Ferry service and I had to go to the bathroom. Not to put too fine of a poitn on it, but I had to go #2. This is a relevant detail, I'm not telling you this to be gross or to conjure up an unwelcome mental image.
Anyway, I set the Discman behind me on the toilet and kept the headphones on, listening to Tom Jones as I did my business. There's nothing like a little Tom Jones in the john. Try it some time.
Anyway, when I had completed the transaction, I stood up - and the headphone chord yanked my disc player off the back of the toilet and right into the toilet bowl - before I had flushed, if you know what I mean. I screamed an obscenity, undoubtedly frightening the guy in the stall next to me, and quickly plunged my hand into the feculent water to fish out the now ruined and stinky Discman. I had to toss away the entire thing, disc and all, and wash my hands like, seven times. I don't know if I can ever listen to Tom Jones again.
I've been discussing this incident with anyone who will listen and I've gotten mixed responses:
a) Why are you telling me this? Get away from me, I don't even know you.
b) You should get an MP3 player, you're much less likely to drop it in the toilet.
c) Good thing it was just a cheap disc player - just think if that was an expensive iPod.
d) You put your hand in the toilet?
I ask you: what is the answer? Replace my disc player with another cheap disc player and be more careful around toilets in the future, or go digital and get a tiny little MP3 player that will fit in my pocket? I need your guidance, O Dave's Long Box reader.