Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Once again, it is ON

I was born a ramblin’ man, and I must listen to the call of the open road.

The spirit of the American highway sings to me, and she sounds a lot like the bombastic lead singer of Four Non-Blondes, wailing, “WHAT’S GOING ON?!!” I don’t know why the American highway sounds like that, and I kind of wish she didn’t, but I must heed the call regardless of how annoying it is.

As a North American, the need to go on a road trip is ingrained in my genetic code. In the New World we are all wanderers, only a generation or so removed from people who come from Someplace Else. The road trip is part of our identity and our culture, from the Conestoga wagons to Steinbeck to Easy Rider. Combine this deep urge to roam with our love of automobiles and crappy food and you have a powerful biological imperative that you can only ignore for so long. You turn to your buddy – you know, the one who understands – and all you have to say is: “Road trip.”

Once again I am teaming up with my pal Bob for our annual adventure. In years past we have launched a 300 mile boating expedition up bear-infested Lake Roosevelt and back, searched for a ghost town in a blizzard, traversed a burning mountain range, crawled through endless volcanic caves, snapped an axle high up in the Bitterroot Mountains, and made a pilgrimage to the fabled Ring of Fire train wreck.

This time: Megaforce.

Every decent road trip has to have a purpose, a goal that transforms the journey from a standard car vaction into a full-on quest. This year we’re traveling to Wyoming to pick up a Megaforce Destroyer – the dune buggy of the future!

Take a look at this clip – at about the fourteen second mark there’s a good shot of the dune buggy. It’s the one SHOOTING THE LASER!


OK, it’s actually just the fiberglass shell of the dune buggy of the future. But it's from Megaforce! Bob bought the actual Megaforce dune buggy shell on eBay and we’re going to pick that bad boy up and bring it back to Seattle, where Bob will bring it back to its former glory. Or so he tells me.

Bob and I are huge Megaforce fans – I’ve discussed at length why Megaforce is one of the greatest movies ever made HERE – so this is right up our alley.

As usual, Bob drives and I plan the route and navigate. This year I’ve picked a route that should take us through four ghost towns, a few abandoned mines, some old railroad tunnels, and a mountain backroad called "Deadman’s Road." I anticipate awesomeness.

Since we are heading east into the Old West, I have decided that I must grow a moustache (pictured). I just have to, it’s important. I know, I look like a date rapist. In retrospect, I should have started growing the ‘stache earlier, because it will not have reached Sam Elliot / Tom Selleck state by the time we start the trip. Maybe I should get a cowboy hat, that might make me look cooler.

Road Trip 2007 is ON. It’s on like the Wrath of Khan. We must live the Megaforce motto: "Deeds not words."

See y’all next week.

19 comments:

spacekicker said...

At least this time you have provided a reason for the NON posting ;) Have fun. Super awesomeness fun..You should video blog it as well!

Tim Easy said...

That mustache is totally YOU, Dave! Don't shave it off, ever!

Anonymous said...

If you get a cowboy hat you'll go from date rapist to gay porn star. If that's a step up, down, or laterally, I'll leave up to you.

David said...

I think you should aspire to this on your trip. Have a great time!

Anonymous said...

Your trip sounds totally Airwolf. Vaya con dios, amigo.

Teddy said...

Random Mega Force knowledge:

The Mega Force dune buggy is parked outside a surf shop in Newport Beach, Ca. It's been parked in the lot since the 80s. Kinda strange to go for a surf and drive by the movie car of my youth.

Oh, and the "Damnation Planet" 6-wheeled tank is parked by the 5 freeway...

Ken said...

Did you have to? That song was frakking ghastly.

Jason Marsden said...

Good grief, I LIVE in Wyoming! Come visit Casper. It's ... err... neat. Our LCS (whose owner told me to look up your blog in the first place) closed, and I am running short on awesomeness here.

OK, you don't have to visit our bustling commerical center on the high plains, but I'm just tickled you're experiencing Wyoming ghost towns.

Unknown said...

Ghost towns AND abandoned mines? You had damn well be solving some spooky mysteries, Mister Campbell.

Crater said...

Dave you must go goatee with that tash too.

Get the cowboy hat as well.

Awesomeness awaits you.

Mr. Crash said...

The most important Bob to remember on this trip is Bob Hoskins, and how much you look like him.

Unknown said...

eBay Platinum Reserve, huh? Too bad somebody already bought Airwolf.

Anonymous said...

I await tales of your exploits! Await, like the vultures that will no doubt follow you doggedly!

I expect to be regaled with tales of bears, motorcycle gangs, and/or ghost cowboys.

Verif: szlswck
Sizzle Swick---the name of your new 'stache.

Anonymous said...

Clearly, celia has never really READ your blog...

Anonymous said...

...even though it is "really good written"

Anonymous said...

To Jason.

Heh, I used to own that comic shop. Poor poor Pulp Fiction.

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