(Yes, this is a re-post, too. But Kobra demanded it!)
"Go, all of you! Die repelling the intruders, and know you will be blessed beyond your puerile capacity to conceive!"
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About Me
- David Campbell
- Poet, dancer, and friend of animals everywhere.
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Greatest Hits
Blog Archive
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2005
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July
(29)
- Kobra Week! WONDER WOMAN #278 DC Comics, 1981
- Kobra Week! Workforce management the Kobra Way
- Kobra Week! Proof that Kobra truly is the King of...
- Kobra Week! The trial of Kobra
- Kobra Week! Resolving interpersonal conflict the ...
- Kobra Week! My scanner is busted!
- Kobra Week! SUICIDE SQUAD #45, 46, 47 DC Comics...
- Kobra Week! KOBRA #4 DC Comics, 1976
- Employee Motivation the Kobra Way
- Kobra Week! WONDER WOMAN #276 DC Comics, 1981
- KOBRA WEEK: BATMAN AND THE OUTSIDERS #27 DC Comi...
- It beginsss! KOBRA WEEK!
- Superhero Tactics 101: Neck Ramming
- Bang a Gong! Comic Con!
- The one thing I didn't see at this year's Con...
- DOC FRANKENSTEIN #1 Burlyman Entertainment, 2004
- WEIRD WAR TALES #119 DC Comics, 1983
- Silent Running
- DAREDEVIL #172 Marvel Comics, 1981
- THOR #499 Marvel Comics, 1996 (PART TWO)
- THOR #499 Marvel Comics, 1996 (PART ONE)
- CRISIS ON INFINITE EARTHS #9 DC Comics, 1985
- Chaka Khan, Comic-Con
- Batman: Not getting any
- JUSTICE LEAGUE INTERNATIONAL #16 & 17 DC Comics,...
- CAPTAIN AMERICA #383 Marvel Comics, 1991
- Mo' Shadow of the Bat
- You will now refer to me as Devastatin' Dave
- Off Topic: An image that will scar you for life
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July
(29)
17 comments:
Kobra hatesss cute animationsss!
Kobra, I guess, makes the money to fund his world domination schemes by doing management seminars for Fortune 500 companies.
What kind of psychologically disfigured individual does it take to join one of these cult groups, anyway? Look at those Kobra Cult guys. Does Kobra have funky Starro mind-control powers? Those guys look brain-fried. Yet there they are, chanting their Mardi-Gras-snake-costumed leader's name, so totally into the idea of dying for some reason they are too stupid to understand. That's actually pretty damn scary if Kobra can get them to do that. "Go, die, because I say so stupid!" If I could do that, I'd be a snake-inspired cult leader myself.
Does make you wonder, however, if Kobra wouldn't be more successful if he left the "die repelling the intruders" part as more of a suggestion, rather than a command. How many times over the years has Kobra been thwarted maybe just because his minions were faced with either killing a hero or dying in the attempt and chose to follow orders?
Kobra is really Tony Robbins.
Brrr... that's power, man....
Imagine if that was really Kobra's bent in the DCU. Could you imagine what the testimonials would sound like on the infomercials?
"Thanks to Kobra, I've started my own business, lost 75 pounds, bought my own home, and wiped out half of New York."
"I read Kobra's 'Mastering the Henchman Within', and I was changed forever. Because of it, I have embraced my role in the universe, and if Kobra wants to choke me for getting his coffee wrong, I'll 'gak gak' with pride."
"I used to be 300 lbs, chained to the wall in my 10x10 apartment, eating dog food - and then Kobra showed me how to untap my Personal Power. Now I drive an SUV, I own a condo in Delray Beach, and I am helping to usher in the Kali-Yuga, the Age of Chaos! Hail Naja Naja!"
This has been filed away for future use in a company memo.
I really don't want to be anonymous, I just can't remember my (p)assword.
And that's why I am the boss here.
ROFL! I could totally see some of those guys doing testimonials, too. Most probably the guy to the right of Kobra's hand who looks like his mere proximity to Kobra has given him an epiphany.
Wouldn't it be awesome if Kobra became like the equivalent to Marvel's Taskmaster? But instead of training evil people how to fight, he simply trains people how to be evil? And there could be a whole host of lame villains who aren't necessarily part of the Kobra Cult, but they go to Kobra's and return more badass? Like "Underworld Unleashed", only without the magic, or Johns' Rogues in FLASH. "You may have defeated me before, Flash, back when I was just a lame gimmick! But now, thanks to Lord Kobra, the Rainbow Raider has returned with a heart full of blackness! Behold, the Raider of the Dark Rain! I will eat your children! < evil laugh >!"
Apparently the "K" in "Kobra" stands for "Koran."
QUBRA... LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALA.
It had to be said.
"...you will be blessed beyond your puerile capacity to conceive!"
Not only is he a self-help guru, but Kobra apparently also has a stash of fertility drugs and/or viagra!
I wrote the comment about being the boss, but I did not write those others.
Please refer to me as Anon One."
"You may have defeated me before, Flash, back when I was just a lame gimmick! But now, thanks to Lord Kobra, the Rainbow Raider has returned with a heart full of blackness! Behold, the Raider of the Dark Rain! I will eat your children! < evil laugh >!"
That's beautiful, Cove! I hurt myself laughing at that one. Think of what Kobra could have done for Slipknot....
Hail Naja Naja!
My only exposure to Kobra is through his (excellent) Suicide Squad appearances, but I seem to recall that one of his defining character traits is that he's astonishingly charismatic. Doesn't his whole plan in his second SS storyline rely on him convincing his captors to switch sides and join him?
(I'm being deliberately vague to avoid spoilers--it's a great story, and you should either read it or get Dave to blog about it.)
It's ON - I love that Suicide Squad storyline; it's in queue for Kobra Week, as well as the Janus Directive...
Well, I lied. I'll have to hit the Janus Directive when "Crossover Week" rolls around.
Man, that little dancing hillbilly dragon at the top of the page is annoying, isn't it?
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