Hey, The Official Handbook of the Invincible Universe #1 (of 2) hits stores soon. Since a) I wrote some entries and b) it doesn't suck, be a pal and buy a copy for your buddy Dave. I would like to buy some new shoes, and you can help me attain that goal. Everyone has to have goals.
Back from vacation soon - alas, I had no close encounters with bears of any kind this time. I did see a big fucking hawk swoop down and snatch a chipmunk in the woods yesterday, an event that may have traumatized my daughter, who also witnessed the chipmunk abduction/murder. I don't think I helped matters by yelling, "Yes! YES! In your face, chipmunk! That's what it's all about, honey! That's nature, right there! WOO!!!"
Ah, screw the shoes. Buy The Official Handbook of the Invincible Universe #1 and help pay for my daughter's therapy.
18 comments:
What was the chipmunk's name, Dave?
Ch'p!! And: I'm'a purchase that sucker, ASAP.
Watch out for chipmunks.
They have a dark side.
Children should be told the truth Dave that the world is not as Walt Disney said it was. Bambi was fake and Chipmunks are a good source of protien for all predators.
you have a daughter?
you have a wife?
there was sex?
once again Dave surpasses many and is indeed above average.
and chipmunks are the bottem of the food chain and man is at the top.
Teach your little girl some stuff about nature.
If it is fuzzy and walks in the woods it can be eaten by someone or something else. Although whether something should be eaten by something else is a culinary choice at very end. I mean: there are not very many accounts where people say that bear meat or cougar meat tastes better than venison.
What was the chipmunk's name, Dave?
Innocence.
It didn't come out at my store, Dave.
Otherwise I would've burned every copy and eaten the ashes to steal your power and daily hit total.
Good thing you didn't see any bears, because bears can do terrible things to you.
I once killed a chipmunk with a weedeater. Not sure how that fits into the whole circle of life, but there it is.
Dave and Invincible. F#%* Yeah! I will hunt and buy my copy today.
P.S. I would buy 10 copies if it meant more Velvet Marauder stories in the future.
Unless you actually witnessed the hawk eating the chipmunk, you can always tell your kid that they are just playing tag and now the chipmunk is "it"
word verification: "qkkmuauz": the sound the chipmunk likely made when the hawk snatched him
That clever, clever Chip 'n' Dale will no doubt be shoving dynamite down the throat of that hawk any moment now. Boom! Cue high-pitched, chattering giggles as feathers float down around their pile of nuts.
Chris Arndt says: you have a daughter?
you have a wife?
there was sex?
once again Dave surpasses many and is indeed above average.
Not only that, but apparently, he's either married to Big Barda or has a daughter who will grow up to be Big Barda. Possibly both.
You don't want to know the search terms that produced that post as the one and only result. Dave would probably punch me just for putting those terms in sequence if he knew.
Thanks, Dave, for the "Innocence" joke. Now I have to explain to my boss why I spit coffee all over my computer. I'm trying to think of an acceptable porn site to reference so I don't have to say "I was reading this great comics blog..."
sorry to burst the awesome bubble dave has blown, but the Invincible Handbook is getting tweaked as we speak and clip art is being upgraded from scanned images to nice pristine digital art files, so everything looks ultra sweet when it comes out later this month.
Please understand I put this monster together while working a regular full time job and had to coordinate over eighty (80) different artists, inkers and colorists as well as 5 seperate writers, no easy task without a support staff of any kind. Anyway, the second book is being finished up now, the first one is at the printers and all be be right with the world soon. Be patient, it will be worth it, and Daves Science Dog entry is F#%@ing AIRWOLF!
"That clever, clever Chip 'n' Dale will no doubt be shoving dynamite down the throat of that hawk any moment now. Boom! Cue high-pitched, chattering giggles as feathers float down around their pile of nuts."
And then the hawk crashes down nearby with his beak on the other side of his head, right?
(Sure, that's some WB/Disney gag cross-pollination, but so was Darkwing Duck.)
ha ha ha! Your blog is always sure to make me laugh.
Hawk: 1 | Chipmunk: 0
Better luck next time!
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