Friday, September 23, 2005

Airwolf: The Adjective

I'm going off-line for a week as my krew and I take a late summer/early fall vacation up north. My sinister corporate overlords demand I use up my vacation hours before the fiscal year starts anew. I'll be in a cabin (or a cottage as my Canadian relatives call it) and will intentionally not be suckling from the broadband teat for an entire Earth week, which will be strange and hard for me. No Google? No IMDB? No Fanboy Rampage? I'm getting uptight just thinking about it.

Anyway, before I go, a parting gift. In the comments section Dave's Long Box readers have been discussing using the word "Airwolf" as a universally positive adjective. Rumor has it that back in the day, the producers of the hit TV show Airwolf were smoking crack and they thought, "Wouldn't it be great if kids started using Airwolf as a synonym for 'cool?'"

The true architect of the whole "Airwolf as Adjective" concept was not a cracked out Hollywood-type, but was actually Ernie Cline, who did a brilliant spoken word piece called "Airwolf" back in 2000 that you can check out RIGHT HERE. Cline released a CD in 2001 called Ultraman is Airwolf that I will have to track down for the title alone. Think about it: Ultraman IS Airwolf.

I think it's a great idea, so as my way of seeding the pop cultural landscape, I've created some images to help promote the concept. Send them to your friends, co-workers, mother, or elected official (except the last one) and let's all help push Airwolf: The Adjective into the zietgeist!

Look how versatile Airwolf is! Send it to your mom:



Send it to a co-worker:



Or to your homeboy:



Or, really, just send a picture of Ernest Borgnine with a knife.




Okay, kids! Have a fully Airwolf week and don't crack the Internet in half while I'm gone!

68 comments:

  1. So, when you say "Send them to your friends, co-workers, mother, or elected official (except the last one)", do you mean "don't send any of these to your elected representative", "don't send the last one to anyone" or "don't send the last one to your elected representative"?

    Because you know, I think I may have done a bit of a Blue Thunder...

    ReplyDelete
  2. I think Kelvin's thinking too much.

    ReplyDelete
  3. This blog is totally fucking Riptide.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hmmm... I think this whole plan backfired. When I was a kid we used Blue Thunder as an noun: 'Dude! You should see the Blue Thunder I just left in the can!'

    I could see the Airwolf concept working...heck this blog has increased my vocabulary in incredible ways.

    ie: 'Holy crap are Power Girl's Power Girls TOTALLY Airwolf'

    And Ernest Borgnine with a knife is just asking for trouble. He's a dangerous man...

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous8:02 AM

    Your Airwolf guide is totally Manimal.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Dave, I think some of these utter Streethawks are being a bit too sarcastic, and aren't taking this Airwolf thing seriously enough. Let's take the sons-of-Banaceks out back and kick the seaQuest DSV out of them.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Yeah, don't make me get all Tenspeed and Brownshoe on your asses.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous9:09 AM

    http://www.ernestcline.com/spokenword/airwolf.htm

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous9:47 AM

    That Airwolf poem thing is beautiful.

    ReplyDelete
  10. A post so good I had to write a haiku about it!

    Airwolf adjective?
    Borgnine so loves that concept.
    He'll still stab you, though.

    ReplyDelete
  11. You would not believe just how Automan I am about this whole business. It's too Holmes and Yoyo for words. Seriously.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Pffft. More like Turbo Teen.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anonymous11:14 AM

    Automan - I think Desi Arnez Jr did his finest work on that short lived but beloved series.

    Granted, it's no SuperTrain...

    ReplyDelete
  14. Anonymous12:36 PM

    Hey now, don't go getting all Viper on us...

    ReplyDelete
  15. Anonymous5:50 PM

    Hey, since Dave's out for a while, what kind of havok can we play with his website?

    Uh...not that I would..you know, just hypothetically speaking?

    ReplyDelete
  16. Anonymous8:44 PM

    Is Mom okay? She looks a little . . . melty.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Maybe we can strive to break 100 comments on this Airwolf thing. Or on the no underwear post. Either way, he will have no choice but to bow to our demands for "Esther Roll Week" BWAA-HA-HA-HA!!!

    ReplyDelete
  18. I meant Esther Rolle obviously. Who in their right mind would want an Esther Roll week? I mean, c'mon.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Anonymous7:07 AM

    I'm just gonna come right out and admit that I've never seen Airwolf(Don't hate, I just need love and understanding). I'll read up on it, though, 'cause I don't want to get left out by the cool kids.

    'Misfits of Science'...now that was the shizz. Johnny B..women wanted him, men wanted to be him. Electricity and Ray Bans were never so cool.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Anonymous10:27 AM

    3 things:


    1. semantics: You can't always guess what someone else is saying based on context.

    "How DSV of you to drop in like that!"

    You can't expect people to guess what you mean. We should create a Thesaurus with the etymology and explanation of all these terms.


    2. Careful with the Canadian countryside, sir. I know rumors of a wolf man (?), thing up there. They say he's harmless and he mostly hangs out with wolves and stuff - but I wouldn't go there if the tourist season wasn't at its peak.


    3. towards the end of your post you - obviously a typo - misspelled zeitgeist

    ReplyDelete
  21. Anonymous5:09 PM

    Ok, will someone please explain to me the appeal of the show "Airwolf" ? I mean, it was on the air for three seasons and that's two and a half more seasons than "Firefly" got. That is not right. I demand an explanation, y'all.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Anonymous12:29 AM

    You obviously don't understand how fuckin righteously airwolf Airwolf was.

    ReplyDelete
  23. While Firefly MAY have been a better show, you can't go around saying "My tax returns were totally Firefly", that just sounds lame. Now "My H&R Block rep says my receipts are completely Airwolf" is a much better sentence by any standard.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Anonymous7:43 PM

    Ok, y'all, for serious now. I am going to commit a fangirl sin, but I must! here goes: The movie "Serenity" is like "Airwolf." except 1.) it's set in space. 2.)It's much more awesome. 3.)There are guns instead of weak phasers or blasters, because it's a space western in a good way. Unfortunately, they had to cut Ernest Borgnine out of the film due to an ongoing union dispute, so they added people fighting for freedom instead. Also there are some hot girls. Okay I'm not explaining it well, but go see it! Or I'll be kicked out of the cult! Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Anonymous7:47 PM

    Winterteeth, you underestimate my geek kung-fu. I can and in fact plan to say that to people the next time I get some tax returns. because I have no shame when it comes to Firefly-related geekery. None.

    ReplyDelete
  26. While I have no doubts that your Geek fu is formidable, I still posit that the word "Firefly" doesn't carry the sheer awesomeness that the word "Airwolf" does. Now, perhaps if you said "Firewolf" or "By Borgnine's flaming knife!" you could relate similar awesomitude. Neologisms rule.
    Of course, as a Firefly/Serenity fan myself, I understand the desire to work something Browncoatish into the lexicon of cool. How about "Well, I'll be Wash's T-Rex" or "He Mal'ed the hell out of that guy"? Just trying to spread the love. Or better yet, using Kaylee as shorthand for "hot" as in "That girl at the used book store is so Kaylee, I almost Jayned in my pants." And that ends the Whedon ass-kissing portion of this commentary. At least for me.

    ReplyDelete
  27. BTW, Bully's haiku is awesome. And we need more help with breaking Dave's site with excessive comments, people.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Absolutely incredible. Thanks, man.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Winterteeth said..."BTW, Bully's haiku is awesome."

    Golly! Thanks, Winterteeth. You're totally Blue Thunder to me.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Anonymous12:26 PM

    Being a Firefly fan, I really dig winterteeth's use of "Kaylee" as a synonym for "hot". Soon, Dave's Long Box devotees, like Trekkies, will have a large enough specialized lexicon to speak in a vernacular completely incomprehensible to the common man.

    "Dude, Power Girl's Power Girls in that Airwolf issue of JSA Classified were totally Kaylee."

    Guaranteed to confuse and alienate your fellow man.

    ReplyDelete
  31. May I mama dog face to the banana patch?

    ReplyDelete
  32. Anonymous5:49 PM

    Here's an interesting thought in regards to the DLB lexicon: could something be considered "Tarzan"? It'd be hard to nail down its connotation. It could mean 'Johnny Weissmuller cool', or sucks like Ron Ely.

    Airwolf is singular in this regard, unless some hack decides to do a remake with that goof Seann William Scott and Peter Doyle in the roles of Hawke and Santini, respectively. Then, God help us, black holes couldn't suck more....

    ReplyDelete
  33. Anonymous5:52 PM

    Hey, Cove West! Where you at, yo?

    ReplyDelete
  34. Anonymous6:46 PM

    By Borgnine's Flaming Knife, I think Winterteeth and Patrick are on to something. I wonder, could we break Dave's blog more efficiently and quickly if we broke into factions and started a flame war? How does everybody feel about that? Join the Browncoats or I'll cut you!!! Don't make me have to break out the Glocks and the clever neologisms, because I'll do it! I'm a geek on the edge!

    there

    ReplyDelete
  35. I think I may have to defend myself as I was referred to as "Blue Thunder" (which is the anti-airwolf). I'm sure it was meant in a nice way but Roy Scheider with a turtleneck vs. Borgnine with a knife? No contest.

    Let's see who can make the longest non-sensical passage using tv show titles that sound dirty. I'll begin, "I was Idiot Boxing Baywatch on my Airwolf DVR player with my Hooperman hanging out. My roommate walked in with a Something About Love look on his face and kicked me in my Simon & Simons. He said, 'put your Perfect Strangers away, my totally Solid Gold girlfriend is coming over to give me some real Felicity action.' Well, what else could I do? I put away my Hogan Family and said, 'Go Snorks yourself, you Sonny Spoon Go-Bot.' And with that, he Card sharked me. Big time." And...scene.

    Too far?

    ReplyDelete
  36. I'm up for a flame war. You total Dick Spanners are all BJ and the Bearing over this Firefly thing, which just shows how Andromeda you lot really are.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Anonymous6:27 PM

    Since dave is on vacation, this may be the best time to ask: What the airwolf does "/* mean? I have seen it used in so many different ways, I cannot get its meaning just from the content of the sentence. Any takers? Thank you.
    -A

    ReplyDelete
  38. Anonymous7:10 PM

    I dig (dug) Firefly, but to get all 'Parker Lewis Can't Lose' over it and start IDing one's self as a 'Browncoat'? That's sooo New Munsters.... it's almost 'Small Wonder' in 'Booker'-ness.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Anonymous9:43 PM

    anonymous said...

    Since dave is on vacation, this may be the best time to ask: What the airwolf does "/* mean?


    What does Airwolf mean?

    Well, Airwolf's that special feeling you get when you hold hands with your best girl!

    It's cheering real loud for the home team!

    It's catching the perfect wave!

    It's obeying all the rules!

    ...

    NO WAY!!!

    ReplyDelete
  40. Anonymous8:48 AM

    Andromeda? Did you just call me Andromeda?! Where I come from, those are fighting words, you Farscape-hating Enterprise-canceller. You probably work for a NETWORK. Bring it.

    ReplyDelete
  41. I think I may have to defend myself as I was referred to as "Blue Thunder" (which is the anti-airwolf). I'm sure it was meant in a nice way but Roy Scheider with a turtleneck vs. Borgnine with a knife? No contest.

    Sorry Mister Winterteeth! It was meant in the nicest way possible. I'm not always up on my references as I'm just a little stuffed bull.

    When i tell you you're totally Homeboys in Outer Space, it's a compliment, okay?

    ReplyDelete
  42. Anonymous7:30 PM

    "Small Wonder"? Ouch. There's no need for ultimate insults, now.

    ReplyDelete
  43. Anonymous3:15 AM

    Among my people, the Airwolf theme has long been used as shorthand reference for The Sex, in honor of String's cheap softcore porn.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Oh no! Dave is almost back home and we haven't even baked him that Airwolf pie!

    ReplyDelete
  45. Dammit, Bully, you're right. Kelvin, grab some flour. Verity, we need snozberries, STAT. Konstantinos, warm the oven. Gang, we've got very little time and I think I lost the Rainbow Brite decorations for the topping. I know, yell at me later. Right now, we're in the shit and pointing fingers isn't going to help.
    Now, this can go He-Man or this can go Thundar, let's make it happen people!

    ReplyDelete
  46. Anonymous10:11 PM

    Just saw Serenity....very Blackstar!

    Quick! Somebody stall Dave!

    ReplyDelete
  47. Anonymous11:48 PM

    Thank you for your good taste in going to see "Serenity", SW. I think blackstar=Airwolf? I hope? No snozberries for anybody until you all provide ticket stubs.

    ReplyDelete
  48. nyulsHoly F'n crap that was funny.

    "You obviously don't understand how fuckin righteously airwolf Airwolf was."

    Never heard it put better in my life.

    ReplyDelete
  49. Anonymous1:20 AM

    airwolf kicks blue thunders ass

    ReplyDelete
  50. Anonymous10:09 AM

    I just want to say that this is so airwolf that I'm having to spread it around.
    http://www.livejournal.com/users/eman_p/311624.html

    ReplyDelete
  51. Anonymous10:09 AM

    I just want to say that this is so airwolf that I'm having to spread it around.
    http://www.livejournal.com/users/eman_p/311624.html

    ReplyDelete
  52. Anonymous12:38 PM

    I went to this Airwolf Chinese buffet and was feeling completely Facts of Life by the time we left.

    ReplyDelete
  53. Okay...so where can I get a wallpaper that says "This podcast is so fucking Airwolf!" *LOL* I was a huge fan of the original Airworlf...which is why I was so disgusted with the sequel they tried to produce without Borgnine and Michael-Vincent. Yeah, Blue Thunder's got nothing on Airwolf...well, TV's BT. Roy Scheider rocks in the film.

    *** end of file ***

    ReplyDelete
  54. Anonymous10:47 AM

    This whole thread is just so Voyager.

    ReplyDelete
  55. Hunter was pretty Airwolf too:

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0086734/

    ReplyDelete
  56. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Anonymous8:07 PM

    When you take a viagra you are AIRWOLF

    ReplyDelete
  58. The series's protagonist is Stringfellow Hawke (played by Jan-Michael Vincent), a loner who lives in a cabin in the mountains, only accompanied by his Bluetick Coonhound, "Tet", and the surrounding wildlife. march madness Hawke is a recluse, spending most of his time alone with his priceless collection of paintings, and serenading eagles with his equally priceless Stradivarius cello. His only real friend and mentor is the older, eternally cheerful Dominic Santini (Ernest Borgnine).
    http://www.enterbet.com

    ReplyDelete
  59. Anonymous12:21 PM

    Spam posts, and their posters, are the anti-Airwolf. Seriously.

    ReplyDelete
  60. Anonymous3:58 AM

    Not so bad

    ReplyDelete
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    重庆建筑资质代办 服务态度好

    ReplyDelete
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  63. Anonymous3:24 AM

    滤油机 万美滤油机,中国滤油净化技术专家、节能、环保先锋
    oil purifier hongqing Wanmei Oil Purifier,oil
    filter purification of technical experts in China,energy saving,a pioneer in environmental
    protection
    打标机 知道如来佛吗?知道他额头上的东东吗?哼,我打出来的
    激光打标机 想知道能干嘛吗?去看看哦
    重庆锅炉 在珠峰顶,都能把水烧到100度
    锅炉 回家洗个热水澡
    重庆广告公司 重庆广告公司 LED电子显示屏
    重庆交通设施 不堵车,才是硬道理
    重庆摄像机 报告:发现一只小强
    重庆工商代办跷脚老板,就是这么好当
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    重庆十字绣牛郎织女千里迢迢
    瘦身产品让你拥有苗条身材
    重庆烤漆设备 哇……好便宜哟……
    重庆烤漆房 可以到处跑的房子……真好
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